Clean Up Your Filthy Boyfriend

You're a bit of an OCD and find yourself drawn to a rough boyfriend who's pretty disorganized. Because you know, it's opposites attract. His fridge is forever empty, his house is a pigsty. He doesn't bathe daily, and you oddly enjoy his musky scent. Great sex, obviously. But is he really marriage material for the long haul?

Here's a step-by-step guide to cleaning up your filthy boyfriend inside and out so he can be a worthy partner for life. This is about shifting his mindset and lifestyle, making him ready for a committed relationship with you. Shall we?

Step One: A Brutal Reality Check

Your boyfriend needs a good old reality check about how his messiness is affecting your relationship. It’s time to make him aware of the impact and motivate him to change.

• Schedule a Serious Talk: Sit him down and talk openly about how his messy habits are driving you crazy. Use specific examples to illustrate how his chaos affects your daily life. Maybe it's that pile of dirty laundry that never seems to shrink or the dishes that have become permanent residents in the sink. Be honest about how it's putting a strain on your relationship.
• Discuss the Consequences: Lay out what happens if things don’t change. Let him know that his habits are not just annoying but are pushing you away. Explain that it’s hard to see a future together if he doesn’t step up and take responsibility for his mess. Make it clear that this isn’t just about cleanliness; it’s about showing he’s capable of being a responsible partner.
• Offer a Visual Cue: Sometimes people don’t realize the extent of the mess until it’s right in front of them. Take photos of the worst spots in his living space and show them to him. This can be a powerful wake-up call that makes him see the situation from a different perspective.

Step Two: Create a Game Plan

Once he understands the need for change, help him develop a game plan for getting his life and space in order. A clear plan will make it easier to tackle the chaos.

• Break It Down: Help him break down the cleaning tasks into manageable chunks. Create a checklist of areas that need attention, like the kitchen, bathroom, and bedroom. Work together to set priorities and decide where to start. Focus on one room at a time to avoid feeling overwhelmed.
• Set a Timeline: Agree on a realistic timeline for when each task should be completed. Maybe it’s dedicating a weekend to deep cleaning or spending 30 minutes each day tackling clutter. Having a deadline will keep him accountable and provide a sense of urgency.
• Get the Right Cleaning Kits: Equip him with the cleaning supplies he needs to do the job right. Think of it as a cleaning kit with essentials like multi-surface cleaner, sponges, trash bags, and a good vacuum cleaner. Having the right tools can make the process more efficient and less daunting.

Step Three: Establish New Habits

Cleaning up isn’t a one-time event; it’s about creating lasting habits that keep things tidy over time. Help him develop a routine that maintains order.

• Morning and Night Rituals: Suggest he starts each day by making his bed and putting away any clothes lying around. Before going to bed, he should do a quick tidy-up to make the morning less hectic. These small habits will help him start and end the day on a positive note, setting a tone of organization.
• Weekly Clean-Up Sessions: Encourage him to set aside a specific day each week for a more thorough cleaning session. This can include vacuuming, dusting, and tackling any mess that’s accumulated. It’s like hitting the reset button to keep things from spiraling out of control.
• Declutter Regularly: Make decluttering a regular practice. Encourage him to go through his belongings every few months and get rid of items he doesn’t use or need. This not only keeps his space tidy but also helps him feel more organized and in control.

Step Four: Reinvent Personal Hygiene

You think you love his masculine smell, but that will change over time, believe me. When he stops appearing sexy to you, his bad BO will become nothing but unbearable. He needs to make sure he's taking care of himself. For himself and for you, too.

• Upgrade the Grooming Routine: Help him develop a grooming routine that covers all the basics: showering regularly, brushing teeth twice a day, and shaving or trimming facial hair as needed. Remind him to use deodorant and wear clean clothes. These might seem like small things, but they make a huge difference in how he presents himself.
• Invest in Self-Care Products: Encourage him to invest in quality self-care products like a good shampoo, conditioner, and body wash. Skincare products like a facial cleanser and moisturizer are also important. Taking care of his appearance will boost his confidence and show that he values himself and the relationship.
• Stay Consistent: Personal hygiene is all about consistency. Make sure he understands that maintaining these habits is non-negotiable if he wants to show he’s serious about being a good partner. A clean, well-groomed appearance reflects a person who is ready to take on life’s responsibilities.

Step Five: Build Emotional Maturity

Cleaning up his act means working on emotional maturity, too. He needs to grow into someone who can handle the ups and downs of life and relationships.

• Encourage Open Communication: Foster an environment where both of you can talk openly about feelings, frustrations, and expectations. He needs to learn how to express himself clearly and listen actively. Good communication is key to solving issues and preventing future conflicts.
• Develop Problem-Solving Skills: Teach him to approach problems logically rather than emotionally. Encourage him to think things through, consider different solutions, and take decisive action. This skill will help him deal with challenges in life and in your relationship.
• Practice Patience and Understanding: Help him develop patience and understanding, especially when things don’t go as planned. Life is full of unexpected twists, and learning to handle them gracefully is part of growing up. This will also make him a more supportive and empathetic partner.

Step Six: Create a Vision for the Future

Help him see the benefits of changing his habits and growing up. Show him how these changes can lead to a fulfilling life together.

• Discuss Shared Goals: Talk about what you both want for the future. Maybe it’s buying a home, traveling, or starting a family. Show him that having an organized life will make achieving these goals easier and more enjoyable.
• Highlight Relationship Benefits: Explain how his improvements can strengthen your relationship. Living in a tidy space can reduce stress and lead to more quality time together. It shows he’s willing to invest in making your life together better.
• Emphasize Personal Growth: Let him know that this journey isn’t just about making you happy; it’s about his growth as an individual. Becoming more organized and responsible will benefit him in every aspect of life, from work to personal relationships.

Step Seven: Hold Him Accountable

Change doesn't happen overnight, and sometimes people slip back into old habits. Be ready to hold him accountable and remind him of his commitments.

• Regular Check-Ins: Have regular check-ins to discuss progress and any issues that may arise. Use these moments to provide constructive feedback and encouragement. It’s a chance to see how far he’s come and where he still needs improvement.
• Set Boundaries: Make sure he knows that if he doesn’t keep up his end of the deal, there will be consequences. Set boundaries about what is acceptable and what isn’t, and be firm in enforcing them. You’re not his maid, and he needs to understand that.
• Be Patient but Firm: While it’s important to be patient and give him time to change, don’t let him off the hook easily. Hold him accountable for his actions and remind him that these changes are necessary for a successful future together.

Step Eight: Evaluate the Relationship

If he’s making real progress, great! But if he’s not willing to change, you might need to evaluate whether this relationship is right for you.

• Look for Genuine Effort: Assess whether he’s genuinely trying to change. Is he taking responsibility for his mess, or is he just doing the bare minimum to keep you happy? Genuine effort shows he’s committed to improving himself and your relationship.
• Reflect on Compatibility: Consider whether your values and lifestyles are compatible. If he’s unwilling to meet you halfway, it might be time to reconsider if this relationship is what you want long-term. You deserve a partner who shares your commitment to creating a happy life together.
• Decide on the Future: Ultimately, decide whether you see a future with him. If he’s willing to grow and change, then it’s a sign that he’s ready to be a true partner for life. But if he’s not, don’t be afraid to walk away and find someone who will treat you with the love and respect you deserve.

With these steps, you’ll help your boyfriend clean up his act inside and out. This isn’t just about having a tidy space; it’s about preparing him to be a loving and responsible partner for life. Let’s hope he rises to the occasion and proves he’s worthy of building a future with you!