Sexy or Creepy? Doppelgangers

Some gay men fantasize them - doppelgangers. You're looking for someone to hook up with and suddenly seeing a man who looks exactly like you. What would you do? Ignore him, smile at him? Imagine he's your boyfriend?

The idea of uncanny look-alikes itself is fascinating, right? Through eerie historical accounts, modern scientific studies, or the influence of social media... They either freak you out or intrigue you. So, doppelgangers. Sexy or creepy?

What is a Doppelganger?

A doppelgänger is a person who looks almost identical to another person but is not related to them. The term comes from German, where "doppel" means double and "gänger" means walker. So a doppelgänger is someone who walks around looking just like you.

The idea has been a popular theme in folklore, literature for centuries, and movies. Meeting someone who looks exactly like you is a strange and surprising experience for sure. It makes you wonder about the mysteries of genetics and how many sets of exact lookalikes exist in the world.

Why Your Doppelgänger?

Attraction often works in mysterious ways, and sometimes we're drawn to people who remind us of ourselves. There's something appealing about being with someone who shares your features, even if that may feel a little narcissistic. But let’s break it down a bit:

• Physical familiarity: You spend your entire life looking at yourself in the mirror. Over time, you get used to your facial structure, your body type, and your general appearance. When you meet someone who mirrors that look, it can trigger a sense of familiarity. It’s almost like looking at an improved or "other" version of yourself, which can feel comfortable and sexy at the same time.
• Confidence boost: Being with someone who looks like you might be subconsciously validating. It could feel like, “Hey, if I find myself attractive, and this person looks like me, then this person is attractive too.” It’s not necessarily ego-driven, but it can be a way of confirming your sense of self-worth or physical appeal.
• Curiosity: Part of it might just be curiosity. You know what it's like to be yourself, but how would it feel to be intimate with someone who’s physically similar? That curiosity could push you toward wanting to hook up or date your doppelgänger.

Think about how you feel when you look at your own videos. Sometimes it’s uncomfortable, but other times, you think, “I look good.” Imagine if that feeling extended to someone else—a living, breathing version of you.

Is This About Narcissism?

Let’s get this out of the way: liking someone who looks like you doesn’t automatically make you a narcissist. It’s easy to throw that word around, but it’s important to separate real narcissism from this kind of attraction. Narcissism involves being obsessed with oneself to the detriment of others, and that’s not really the case here. What you’re dealing with is more about attraction based on familiarity and perhaps a little bit of self-esteem.

• It’s not self-love: If you wanted to hook up with yourself, sure, maybe that would be closer to narcissism. But you’re attracted to another person who happens to share your physical traits. The dynamic changes when there’s another person involved, even if they resemble you. This is about connection (yes, even if it’s casual), not just self-love.

• Doppelgänger vs. twin: If you had an identical twin, this would be a different conversation. But since this is a lookalike, there’s still some separation between you and the other person. You're not admiring yourself, but someone else who reminds you of yourself. That’s a key difference to consider.

• Attraction to certain traits: Think about the traits you're drawn to. Is it just the face, the body type, or something more? If it's purely looks, sure, some people might raise an eyebrow, but it’s your type. We all have types. Some guys are into tall dudes, muscular builds, or certain hairstyles. In your case, it happens to be someone with your face.

Being attracted to someone who looks like you could say more about your personal taste than about any deep-seated psychological issues. It’s not really about being in love with yourself; it's just that you happen to like the physical traits that you possess.

What Is Their Personality Like?

Now, onto the question of personality. Obviously, no two people are the same, even if they look alike. So don’t go assuming that just because someone looks like you, they’ll have the same mindset, mannerisms, or interests.

Here are a few things to consider when thinking about your doppelgänger's personality:

• Different life experiences: Even if someone looks like you, their life experiences will shape them differently. They might have grown up in a different environment, had different relationships, or faced unique challenges. These experiences make them who they are, just as yours make you who you are.

• Opposites attract: There’s also the possibility that your lookalike could be completely different from you personality-wise. Maybe you're introverted, and they’re extroverted. Or perhaps they have a totally different sense of humor. You might look alike but feel like total opposites when you talk or interact with each other. This could either be refreshing or frustrating, depending on your dynamic.

• Don’t project: Avoid projecting your personality onto them. It’s easy to assume that because someone looks like you, they must think like you, but that’s not always the case. Try to approach them with an open mind, instead of expecting them to mirror your personality. Even though their face might be familiar, their mind could be something else entirely.

Think of it like meeting any other person you’re attracted to. Their appearance might spark interest, but the real substance will come from how you interact and connect on a deeper level. The physical might pull you in, but the personality will keep things interesting.

Hooking Up With Your Lookalike

If you’re just looking for a casual hookup with someone who resembles you, that’s cool too. It's your life, and what you're attracted to is nobody's business but your own. That being said, a few things could pop up that are worth thinking about before diving into it.

• Initial awkwardness: The first time you hook up with someone who looks like you, it could feel a bit weird. You might catch yourself staring at them a little too long, or they might do the same to you. That moment of realization—“Wow, we look a lot alike”—can either be a turn-on or a mood-killer, depending on how you handle it.

• Be chill about it: If you’re really into this idea, don’t overthink it. Treat it like you would any other hookup. You’re into the person, and that’s all that matters in the moment. If you make it too much of a “thing,” it could get weird fast.

• Potential reactions from them: The other person might notice the resemblance too, and they may or may not be into it. Some people might love it, while others could be freaked out by the idea of hooking up with someone who looks like them. So, just be prepared for that. Their reaction could go either way, and you'll want to be cool with however it plays out.

If they’re as into it as you are, then great! But if they’re not, don’t take it personally. Not everyone is going to find the resemblance as sexy as you do, and that’s okay.

Can It Turn Into a Relationship?

Turning a hookup with your doppelgänger into a relationship is definitely possible, but it’s going to depend on more than just your physical resemblance. The real question is: do you like each other beyond just the looks?

Here’s what you should keep in mind if you’re thinking about going from casual to serious:

• Physical attraction isn’t everything: At the start, the fact that they look like you might feel exciting and novel. But in a long-term relationship, you’ll need more than just looks to keep things going. If your connection is purely physical, it could fizzle out once that initial spark fades.

• Get to know their quirks: Spend time learning about them. Find out what makes them tick, what their interests are, and how they handle life. You might discover that you have more in common than just your appearance, which could be the foundation for something deeper.

• Compatibility beyond the surface: If the relationship has any chance of lasting, you’ll need to connect on other levels—emotional, intellectual, and perhaps even lifestyle-wise. Otherwise, you’re just dating a mirror image, which may lose its appeal over time.

If you genuinely like this person beyond their looks, then give the relationship a shot. But if it’s just about the novelty of being with someone who looks like you, it might not have much staying power in the long run.